My mind seems always tuned to prove some of the characteristics of God through the analogy of observed reality. I've always been a kind of doubting Thomas and find myself from time to time with shallow faith. It's easy for me to portray a brave face and simply assert that God is the author of creation, that he has a plan for me, that he loves his creation, that I can be saved, that I am persevering, etc. It is far more difficult to formulate a rationale (i.e., realization) for these assertions considering the obvious paradoxes of our world. I think it is intellectually dishonest for me to rely on assertion, i.e., blind faith, and to forgo the process of rigorously trying to understand the nature of the revealed God through his creation. To my credit, perhaps as a grace, I have been looking closely at the nature of things in order to extract any possible revelation that I can from the observable universe and the human beings of this world.
This method unfortunately has some disadvantages. First, it is very difficult to explain these reasons to others, because the language is limited (the words and analogies I can find in my repertoire to describe these reasons and the general depth of the material to consider). Second, I am seeing it more like a personal quest and not useful for the edification of others (although other truth seekers I've come across are perspicacious enough to engage in useful dialog). Third, it is contrary to dogmatism--this is where I can get into trouble with those who see the world as black and white, true and false, saved and damned.
To be sure, I believe all of the precepts of the Apostles' Creed. Yet, I cannot stop there; I feel the need to continue further speculation. This requires a steady diet of 'thought variety' of learning new points of view, new systems of thought, new opinion, new mantras, new knowledge; a greater wisdom. I can get into trouble if I say these words in earshot of dogmatists.
As a material being in a world made of stuff, dealing every day with stuff, being sustained through stuff, thinking about stuff, I would conclude justly that I have an inseparable bond with the material world--it sustains me, it teaches me, it guides me. I've got nothing else to go on; I should use it--this only makes sense! I think in concrete terms, things that I can see, things that I can understand, things that I am still trying to grasp (as far as I have experienced there has been no knowledge outside of my senses and of the a priori categories of knowledge). So far the angel Gabriel has not descended to my mind in order to correct idols (i.e., erroneous and heretical imagery I use to represent God as I pray to Him, and think about Him as I reflect the nature of God, etc), nor to correct any logical errors I am making, any misconceptions I have about God and others, etc. Yes, spirit is important, but I'm allowed my next breath so long as my heart beats and I draw oxygen to my lungs, hence my close relationship to matter and material things. How do I know that I am pleasing to God? I can get into trouble if I say these words in earshot of dogmatists.
I am also flesh, I wear clay shoes on my clay feet at church and outside of church. These are the shoes I've been given (Adam's broken covenant). I share this fashion--these clay shoes--with all of humanity. Yet the divinity of the invisible God is made visible through human beings. These humans are the "last mile" so-to-speak from heaven and the ones we must work with everyday of our lives. To do so properly requires a realistic understanding of humans, the ones living here, far away from here, and in past eras, even these whose religions and worldviews are not the same as mine. Again I can get into trouble if I say these words in earshot of dogmatists.
I will necessarily need to venture outside the circle of received wisdom. I live in universe of plenitude--trillions different things located in different regions within space-time, each having different quantities and qualities; I see a plenitude cultures--hundreds of civilizations spanning thousands of years; I see a plenitude of people--each unique, each his own person, each a special creation; I see plenitude of apparently contradicting worldviews and thought systems.
I am fully fed up with typical programmed biblical responses from the dogmatists, whose straight-jacket thinking and myopic view of reality precludes the possibility of truth outside the 31,000 verses of Scripture. A one-size-fits-all approach constrains the possibilities and does not comport with reality.
